Thanks, Pinsbook!
We all have things that we want to achieve. To have writing published. To lose weight. To run a marathon. To plan the perfect wedding. To learn to sew. There are thousands and thousands of tasks that we set out to accomplish, ranging from minor projects to the big, life-changing stuff. And it feels so good when we actually get there!
However, there's a lot that can get in the way of us achieving our dreams. Sometimes we feel buffeted around by fate, or kicked in the guts by the banal judgements of others. It's hard to keep focus- and even harder to pick yourself up and keep going when you begin to doubt yourself.
Once upon a time, I knew someone that would tread all over my excitement whenever I was embarking on a new challenge. This person repeatedly trampled down the belief that I held in myself, pointing out everything that would go wrong and coercing me to exist in a world where I never went after anything I believed in. The term 'dreamer' became a derogatory judgement on my character, a way to reinforce their belief that my goals and hopes for the future were largely unattainable. 'Romantic' became a cynical and nasty way to describe my persistence to see the good in everyone (and the good in myself!).
I understand now how important it is to keep sight of what your goals are, and the things you need to focus on to keep them in check and keep yourself working towards them.
. . . . .
Mel V via Pinterest!
Have a clear understanding of what you want to achieve
This is where it all starts. What do you want? And really- what do you want? Not your parents, not your partner, not your boss. What do you want? How do you want to feel? Happy? Strong? Fast? Loved? Invincible? Accomplished? Stylish? More importantly- why do you want to feel these things? Having a deeper understanding of why we crave the things that we do is imperative to the achievement of our goals.
If you want to be thin, it's not good enough just to say that you want to be thin so you can be happy. Why aren't you happy as you are? What things about yourself do make you happy? Have a serious think about what it is that you want to achieve and why. You might be surprised by what really triggered your desire for change.
Write it down
This is the fun part! Make messy, vibrant, highly coloured lists! Scribble it all over a giant whiteboard and decorate it in flowers! Getting your thoughts down on paper makes them real, tangible and visual. It filters all the racing around in your brain, and helps you to start clearly mapping out your thoughts.
Write your goals in dot points, scribble things out, underline things ten times and highlight them in pink and yellow. Number them, in order of desire or urgency. Scribble out the numbers and re-order them after you've had a coffee. Visually explore your impulses and start working with your dreams. And of course, don't forget to set a realistic time frame- you can't pay off your credit card in two weeks (unless you win the lottery!)
Do your research
This is the less glamorous, more practical side of dream-living: really understanding the nitty gritty. If you want to go to Europe at the end of next year, you need to sort out finances. Do you want to start a yoga course? How about losing twenty kilos?
Start from the top- what are the practicalities of achieving your goal? Think about money, a time frame, your health and wellbeing. If your goals and dreams aren't well-supported, it will be unbelievably discouraging when you find yourself struggling to achieve them.
Start visualising
I've said it once (ten times) and I will say it again (and will continue to say it forever)- if you think that is what's going to happen, then of course that is what's going to happen. Don't make the mistake of setting out to achieve something believing that you are going to fail! That is no way to foster positive energy! Start working towards things believing that it's only a matter of time before they start to manifest in your life. Check it out:
"I want to lose 15 kilos."
"I am losing 15 kilos."
"I want to be a freelance writer."
"I am a freelance writer."
"I want to have a better relationship with my Mum."
"I have a wonderful relationship with my Mum."
Do you see where I'm going with this?
You need to start putting yourself in a position where you know that you can achieve. Start understanding that by thinking, talking, learning, reading, loving- you are already working towards living your dreams. There's no big secret here. Visualise yourself achieving your goals and you will start to see the benefits and amazing results. I promise!
Surround yourself with people who believe in you
This is not a difficult one to figure out. If you have people in your life who doubt you, make you feel worthless, or even worse, make you feel that you can't achieve anything without their help- cut them loose. They are hurting your self worth. Don't judge your achievements based on what they think of you! It's your life! It's your future!
Don't spend your time with people who like to be negative. These people like to judge others. The like to point our people's flaws, they believe that poor characteristics outweight good characteristics. It's a very sad, lonely way to live. How will you ever learn to love yourself if you find yourself sitting in a dark corner with them, hating everyone esle?
Get in the zone
Yay, colours! This is my favourite part of goal setting, and is a great tool for manifesting change. Humans are very visual creatures. Colours and shapes stimulate our weird and wonderful brains and we learn to associate feelings and emotions with images. Get out your magazines, people- it's time to make a mood board!
Find images, words, sparkly things, tickets, coasters, photographs- anything that you associate with achieving your goal, and start making a collage that you will see every day. Associate your mood board with power, positivity and success. Pinterest is a great way to do this online if you don't want to spend hours with stacks of of issues of Vogue or Q Magazine (and don't forget to follow me- we can be Pinning buddies!)
Reward yourself
A good way to keep yourself motivated is to set small milestones throughout the duration of your goal-achievement time frame. For every $1000 you save towards your trip, treat yourself to a lovely bottle of wine and rent a movie that's set in the place you want to travel to. For every 3 or 4 kilos you lose, buy yourself a lovely piece of jewellery. For each expression of interest you recieve for your writing portfolio, dedicate an hour to learning to make frosting flowers.
Associate your achievements with joy and accomplishment. You deserve to be rewarded for your hard work!
Track your progress
We need to constantly reassess our goals in order to maintain achievement. It might even be that our goals need adjustment based on how we are progressing. If you're ahead of your savings target, why don't you try increasing your weekly savings amount by ten dollars? If you are no longer feeling challenged in your beginners yoga class, maybe you could ask the instructor for a transfer to the intermediate class?
However, it's important to try not to go the other way- that is, adjusting our goals to enable us to under-achieve. The thing is, it's not the fact that you want more time to help you lose weight or save for a holiday- the problem is in the fact that you think you can't. More often than not, the inability to reach our goals is due to a severe lack of confidence in our own abilities. It comes from a fundamental belief that we should probably just settle for what we have. Which is total, complete, utter bullshit. Get out of that mindset, lassie, because you deserve the positive changes you want to see in your life!
Healthy travel budgets and ass-kicking awesomeness,
MJ x
